“Why Do I Attract Intense Guys?” – 6 Reasons

Intensity in a relationship can be a good or a bad thing, depending on the situation.

Many people have said that intense partners are the best, while others say that too much intensity is not good for a relationship.

Whether this is true or not, I will leave you to judge that.

If you have ever wondered why you always attract guys who are more intense than most other guys, this article is for you.

In this article, we will explore why you always seem to attract guys with intense personalities, emotions, and energy levels.

It will also be an eye-opener for you if you are in a relationship with an intense guy.

Also, we will include a little bonus segment on how to navigate intense relationships.

Here we go!

“Why Do I Attract Intense Guys?”- 6 Reasons

1. You have similar energy levels

why do i attract intense guys

This is a significant point we need to consider, just like the one we considered in “Why Do I Attract Weird Guys?”.

One of the major reasons people attract intense players is that they may share similar energy levels.

This means that if you are a high-energy person who can get very passionate about things you are interested in.

Due to this, you may naturally gravitate towards people who exhibit similar behaviors.

When you are used to taking life at a rapid pace, you may find it frustrating if you are in a relationship with a guy who loves to take things easily and slowly.

This may be a subconscious conditioning for most people, but it greatly influences their choices in life and the types of people they give access to their life.

Indeed, the relationship between two intense individuals can be exhilarating but may also come with challenges related to balancing intensity.

2. They are attracted to your confidence

why do i attract intense guys

There is one undeniable thing about intense guys: their confidence.

Intense individuals often exude confidence and assertiveness, which can be attractive to many ladies.

Confidence is a very appealing quality in anyone, regardless of gender.

However, most females find themselves intensely attracted to confident guys.

From the beginning of time, it has been common for females to be attracted to courageous men who can face terrifying situations without flinching.

This trend remains the same.

However, if you find that you attract intense guys, it may be that they are also attracted to your confidence.

Many intense guys like ladies who are confident in their abilities and know their self-worth.

They don’t do so well with ladies who cannot match their energy or women who are unsure.

3. You have shared interests and hobbies

why do i attract intense guys

Another reason you attract intense guys may be that you have shared interests and hobbies.

One thing that characterizes an intense guy is how he gets engulfed in activities that interest him.

When he loves to do something, he throws himself wholly into getting it done.

Intense guys do not believe in doing things halfway and always try to complete whatever needs to be done.

When an intense guy realizes he shares interests and hobbies with you, he may take it as a sign of a deep connection.

It is important to note that when an intense guy comes to this conclusion, he will attempt to move heaven and earth just to build a relationship with you.

If you find that you always attract intense guys, you may need to consider your hobbies.

You may have developed interests or hobbies that intense guys find pleasurable.

4. You are purposeful

why do i attract intense guys


One thing that intense guys find even more attractive than a confident woman is a woman who has plans for her future.

When you have intense goals, you may attract intense guys.

If this is the case, you will probably notice that the moment his interest in you sparked up was when you shared some of your goals and dreams.

Intense guys admire people who set goals and work towards achieving them.

This is especially true if you are so enthusiastic about your goals that they are all you can talk about.

If you behave this way, you shouldn’t be amazed that you attract intense guys.

5. You are intelligent

why do i attract intense guys

If you are dedicated to expanding your knowledge by thoroughly educating yourself on important subjects, you may realize that you attract intense guys.

Intelligence and a readiness to learn are pretty appealing qualities for any guy.

However, intense guys are even more enchanted by intelligence in a lady than other, more laid-back guys.

If you are thoroughly invested in learning and personal growth, many intense guys may gravitate toward you because they find your intelligence and intentionality attractive.

6. You are engaged in activities like volunteering

why do i attract intense guys

Volunteering is another important pastime for most intense guys.

Intense guys always look for a cause they are passionate about and volunteer their time and efforts to create a positive change.

They are powerhouses, and they channel their energies rightly.

If you volunteer often, you may meet with them there, and don’t be surprised if love sparks start flying after a while.

This reminds me of a friend who works tirelessly in the development sector, a very intense woman.

She met her husband at one of the community services she volunteered for, and they clicked immediately because they were cut from the same cloth.

He proposed a month later, and they have been married for seven years.

Everyone agrees that they are a “Power Couple” because of their intensity and how they complement each other.

If you are passionate about volunteering, it may be why you attract many Intense guys.

How To Navigate A Relationship With An Intense Guy

If you consistently find yourself in relationships with intense guys, here are some tips to help you navigate your relationship easily;

1. Effective communication

why do i attract intense guys

It is essential that you practice effective communication in any relationship.

Effective communication involves listening attentively and calmly expressing your feelings and opinions when you need to.

To navigate a relationship with an intense guy, you need to discuss your expectations, boundaries, and concerns with your partner.

In times of conflict, it will be helpful to be calm and not give ‘fire for fire’ as this can cause a breakdown of the relationship.

Most intense guys take the same intensity into conflict resolution, and it will take a lot of understanding and calm to navigate these periods.

This will ensure a healthy balance in the relationship.

2. Self care

Maintain your sense of self even while you are in the relationship.

You have a life outside your relationship, and you must realize this to avoid being overly consumed by your partner’s intensity.

3. Maintain your individuality

It is not every time intense guys get attracted to equally intense ladies.

Sometimes, they find love in the arms of women who don’t share their energy levels.

If this is you, then you must strive to maintain your individuality.

It is easy to fall in the shadow of a partner who is larger than life and constantly powered, but staying true to yourself and remaining authentic will be beneficial to your esteem and relationship.

Don’t lose yourself. 

Stay true to who you are.

4. Seek balance

why do i attract intense guys


You must ensure that you seek balance in your relationship.

While intensity can be exciting, it is important that your relationship also experiences periods of calm and stability.

A healthy relationship is a balanced one.

Never forget this.


Final Words

The reasons you attract intense guys are all listed above.

Attracting intense guys is not bad.

However, you must find ways to balance your relationship to avoid being overly consumed by your partner’s intensity.

The tips above are important to help you navigate your relationships with intense guys.


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