The role that physical attraction plays in choosing the partner you prefer can’t be underestimated.
Everyone has the type of specifications they prefer in a partner.
It’s absolutely normal to be attracted to a specific body type, height, eye color, or skin color.
These are all part of those physical attributes that contribute to how attracted you get to a guy.
However, it becomes problematic when you keep attracting the wrong guys with these same physical attributes.
Suppose you have noticed that you keep dating men who have exhibited toxic or manipulative qualities in the relationship.
In that case, you may be feeling a little worried and concerned about your sense of judgment in choosing a partner.
It may even seem like you are stuck in an unending cycle of dating the wrong men.
And you are helpless to do anything about it because every time you end one relationship, you find yourself in another one that is even worse than the last.
You may start feeling that you are the problem at some point.
This is when you are supposed to stop and find a solution to this endless cycle of relationships with the wrong men.
If you are fed up with attracting the wrong men and want to end the wrong relationships, this article aims to help you by revealing why you always attract the wrong guys.
“Why Do I Attract The Wrong Guys?”- 7 Reasons
1. You are pretending to be someone else
Being uncomfortable in your skin is like a beacon sign that the wrong guys never miss.
It always succeeds at grabbing their attention the same way blood in the sea attracts sharks.
When you are not transparent enough about yourself, you will attract the wrong kind of guys to you.
Pretending to be who you are not or being confused about who you truly are makes it hard for you to have values and defined boundaries.
One of the most attractive attributes of the wrong guy is a lack of defined boundaries.
A lack of boundaries and values pulls the wrong guys in strongly because they see their absence as an avenue to exploit and manipulate you.
If you realize that you are not confident in who you are, you may need to take a break from dating and spend that time on a soul-searching journey.
Find out who you truly are what you truly want, and be proud of your identity before trying to return to the dating scene.
2. You live in a fantasy world
“I am a Barbie girl in a Barbie world. Life in plastic is fantastic.”
Perhaps, just like Barbie, you live in a fantasy world and keep creating images of what you term the perfect man for you.
This perfect man always seems to possess all the qualities you desire in a man.
Immediately, you meet a man who shows you some attention; you create a fantasy in your head that involves you wearing a white wedding gown and him in a tuxedo.
Rushing to create fantasies in your head just because a man is nice to you opens you up to manipulation and exploitation from the wrong men.
If you are wondering why you attract the wrong guys, it may be because you hardly wait to know the man before spinning fantasies about him in your head.
3. You have unrealistic standards
There is no such thing as the perfect man anywhere.
It is just a concept that began and should end in the movies and books.
However, many ladies take these unrealistic standards to heart and make them the yardstick by which they measure men.
It is safe to conclude that since no man is perfect, any man who seems to be perfect to you is probably pretending and hiding a toxic part of himself.
This is why getting to know your intended “partner” is important.
Don’t just jump into relationships, or you may end up jumping out of the relationships hurt and confused.
4. You still carry baggage from past relationships
Past relationships sometimes leave nasty scars.
When you have been a victim of consecutive toxic relationships, you may actually be carrying baggage from those relationships.
You may not have had the best experiences about love, which may be one reason you have a jaded view of love.
It is not uncommon for people to say that love no longer exists because of their bad experiences in the past.
Due to this feeling that love no longer exists, you may have convinced yourself that it doesn’t matter who you are with or how he feels about you.
When you are yet to recover from past trauma, it is important that you avoid dating because your scars may attract the wrong guys to you.
5. You are needy
To actually admit to being needy, you may need to sincerely introspect and examine why you want to be in a relationship.
One of the reasons you attract the wrong guys may be because you are so needy that you find it difficult to be happy and contented, just being by yourself.
The fact is, you may need to learn how to enjoy your own company and avoid being overly dependent on other people for validation and satisfaction.
Mainly, men with toxic behavior avoid women with an independent streak because it makes them difficult to manipulate.
6. You are looking for love in the wrong places
People usually say that love can be found anywhere.
However, some places may defy this belief.
If you are constantly hanging out at places like casinos, brothels, or strip clubs, you may find love, but it may not be the kind you want.
If you desire a guy who is responsible, prudent, and financially stable, you probably won’t find him while hanging out at a strip club.
Expand your horizons.
Abandon your old questionable haunts and locate better, more productive activities to involve yourself in.
In doing this, you will have access to more responsible men who may fit the bill of the man of your dreams.
7. You like bad boys
Growing up, my friends would tell me that girls preferred bad boys.
They told me this because I was always so calm and innocent-looking.
Of course, I didn’t have much romantic success either, but that’s a story for another day.
Many ladies like bad boys; if you are one of them, that’s probably why you always attract the wrong guys.
Most of those “bad boys” attributes that seem so endearing to you in the early days develop into red flags as the relationship gets older.
If you don’t start seeing those “bad boy” qualities for what they actually are, you may continuously find yourself in relationships with the wrong guys.
I hope you find the article helpful.
Addressing why you attract the wrong guys is key to linking up with the right man for you.
Dealing with any behavioral cycles and dating patterns that keep attracting the wrong guys to you is important because ignoring them may cause further damage in the future.
Cheers to finally attracting the right guy!